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Red, White, Blue 5k, Clark, NJ. 7/1/23

7/26/2023

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I recently joined Central Jersey Road Runners Club (CJRRC). They are my most local club. They train at "my" parks. I can't make any of their posted group runs because I am working at those times, but I still like that they are my local club so I joined as a social member. Plus I like Fran. 

I have decided to race "unattached" this year because I don’t want any pressure to show up for a team race when I am still healing from Haglund’s Syndrome. But I love the idea of being part of a team, even if just as a social member. 

The RWB 5k race was a new race organized by the CJRRC. I can't rave enough about this small low-key low-fee event. It was really well done, especially for a new race. The two loop course on a repurposed golf course made it traffic-free and easy to follow. Parking was plentiful. Bathrooms were indoors. It is so nice to be able to wash your hands. ​ And despite the  small number of runners in a race less that cost less us all less than $20, 2 x $1000 checks were provided to two organizations in our local community that help those without financial resources for adequate food and shelter.  ​

5 days after Presidents Cup, this was my second 5k attempt. This was a much smaller race. Dave and I arrived at 6:45 am for the 8:00 am start. We had a tentative plan to run 24 miles that morning with the 5k included. That didn't happen. It was very hot and humid. The sticky weather felt more oppressive than the conditions at President’s Cup.  I have been running in the heat and adapting well, so it wasn’t a huge concern but it was still uncomfortable.

​Unlike the last 5k, I no longer feared the pace of the race. President's Cup helped build my confidence. This race was much less hilly than Presidents Cup. There were mild inclined  and declined sections of the course. I felt like I should be able to run faster here. 

I wanted to correct my pre-race errors from last time. I protected my warm up. We were able to run the course and a little extra getting about 3.6 miles before the race started.  It felt much more relaxed. I felt much better prepared to run fast. I expected to run better. 

Even though it’s hot, a warm up is still important to me. I want to get my heart rate up. I want to get my blood pumping. I want to expand my capillaries before I suddenly start running as fast as I can. I want to get adrenaline and endorphins flowing. I want to get my mind ready. 

My plan was to start at 6:45 pace and try to negative split down to under 6:40. The start was fast and I had trouble dialing in my pace. I think because I was very well warmed up it was actually much easier to start off too fast. I need to be mindful of this next time.  At one point I glanced down and saw 6:12 and really worked to slow myself. But the decline made running fast feel too easy so I settled on 6:35 for mile 1.  Although I knew this was too fast, part of me was happy I could actually move that fast still.  

This first mile felt remarkable comfortable and mislead to believe that the rest of the race would feel this good. 

But Nope. Not at all. ​
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​It was hot and humid and my too fast pace caused me to overheat as we started to the inclined side of the course. I found my ability to slow down…. except it no longer felt like a choice.  I felt sloppy and not in control.  Running just a little bit too fast can really make it all fall apart. M2-  6:59.

I knew I could get my wheels back under me by holding the slower pace for a bit. We would be heading back down that decline again soon and I know it would feel better there.
After the decline we would loop back around for one last incline to the finish. M3-6:54

Knowing that I was first woman without any competition nearby and completed over heating, I finished just a little faster but I gave myself a pass on trying to muster up a kick,  Last .1- 0:38 (6:26 pace)

Running that sub-6:40 wasn't that important to me. I learned enough about my fitness as soon as my wheels fell off.   

Although this race felt like a pacing mess, I managed to do some things that made me happy.
  •  I was pleased to see a 6:35 mile on my watch even if at the wrong time.
  • I was happy to have finished faster than my last 5k by a few seconds.
  • I was also happy to have completed another 5k without causing a set back in my healing progress. ​
Messing up pacing is part of the learning process. I want to do this at small check in races not when it counts.

I have dreams still. I don’t believe that I am completely done yet. If my best races are behind me. I will be perfectly happy with my body of work as a runner. But if I have a chance to achieve more, I am going after those goals. 

This is what it looks like to fumble along, restarting but from a place of knowledge and experience. I know the way to PRs. I just don't know, yet, if I can complete the journey. 

I know the path to success and the path to disappointment tend to start off at the exact same place. Sometime we give up too soon not realizing we were almost there. Sometimes we just cant compete the trip for whatever reason and success wasn’t meant to be. And sometimes we stay motivated, work smart, stay healthy, have support, frequent feedback, learn from mistakes, and we actually achieve what we knew in our hearts we were truly capable of. 

Right now I am a moving along the road… I have my checkpoints planned. I know what actions I want to test out over the next few months. I am hoping that my next check in race will show me that I am moving in the right direction, even if I am not actually there yet. ​
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President's Cup 5k, Millburn, NJ 6/26/23 (First 5k in 3.5 years).

7/21/2023

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​I had been trying to muster up the courage to race a 5k for months. This may sound odd considering I ran a marathon at the end of April and 38 miles in 6 hours two weeks after that.

It has been 3.5 years since my last 5k. 5ks are intense. The first 2 minutes are filled with hope and speed and oxygen… and then it all goes south. Breathing gets hard. Legs get heavy. Turnover slows. It feels like I am running in a dream, trying to move faster, wanting to, but I just can’t lift my legs as easily.  And there is nothing you can do to stop the insanity except get to the finish line as fast as possible.  At least that is how they feel to me. 

I wasn’t really concerned about the suffering. I can suffer physically. ​In hindsight I was worried that I would discover that I just can’t do this anymore, that my body isn’t as resilient as it used to be, as I hoped to be, as I want to be night now.

In my heart, I believe that if I train smart, eat well, and believe in myself that some of my best races may still be before more. Yet, I was afraid a 5k was going to show me that my years of achilles injury took away my chance to achieve new bests.  I was afraid that a fast pace would blow up my achilles again.. I was afraid that the minor hills in this race would be too much for me. I was afraid that there would be nothing I could do because I am already doing everything I can do to get back to running. ​

Race Day Routine and Night Races. 
Most races and most of my training happens first thing in the morning. But the President’s Cup 5k is an 8:00 pm night race in the summer (thunderstorm season). Bad storms were predicted all day. I ran 7 miles with Sid during clear window in the morning in case the race was canceled like it seemed like it would be.

I spent too much energy wondering if the race was on. I intermittently clicked on the race website throughout the day, hoping to see that the race was, in fact, cancelled so I could stop looking to see if it was cancelled.  Had this not been my first 5k in years, I would have simply checked the status before leaving but this was different. I felt like I was planning to walk into a fire and I didn't know if I was hoping for a cancellation or to get it over with. 

As soon as I arrived at the race at 6:30 pm, thunder clapped loudly and the sky dumped rain.  I sat in my car wondering still if this thing was really happening. Then it cleared.

Running a warm up felt imperative. It felt protective. It felt like the only thing I could realistically do to help my body function safely.  Sid was planning to run a warm up with me, but as we headed off to do that his back suddenly spasmed and we walked to get my bib. I thought I had time to run. About 20 minutes later, while we were back at the car Dave arrived and we walked back to get his bib. I thought I had enough time. Spontaneous socializing along the way took time some more time. 

Suddenly I look at my watch we have 30 minutes until gun time. I had not run a step, I would still need time to use the bathroom. So much for protecting myself! I have not idea why I didn't prioritize my needs. This just highlighted for me how out of practice I am when it comes to racing. ​ 

Having a solid, reliable, automated pre-race routine is very important to my performance. I didn't have that dialed in this time, I know this is something I need to work on for more important races in the future. 

Standing on that starting line while trying to visualize the finish felt like a version of Schrodinger’s Cat. I was both strong and weak in my mind. Failing and Succeeding. Dead and Alive.  I wouldn't know until I observed the result. Both versions felt equally likely. I didn't like those odds.  I didn’t want to set back again. But I needed to see where I stood. 

And we’re Off…  Without any real data to set a goal pace, I run by feel. Yet somehow decided I wouldn't be truly happy unless I saw a sub-7 average pace.  Why? I have no idea.  I get up to “cruising altitude” where my breathing starts to get heavy and unsustainable.  I pump the breaks until I find a rhythm I believe I can hold for 3M and still have a kick.

I know the course. Two laps, We get to run the hills twice. The hills aren't major hills but they scared more than the speed.  I look at my watch as we reach the first  mile. M1- 6:47. "Ok, I am doing this.... just stay in control"

I was really pleased with mile 1! Once over one hill and still holding a sub-7, I could feel my confidence returning.  I knew mile 2 was flat but that mile 3 would have the final hill. I was trying to count women during the out and back but since the turn around is really a large circular school driveway with trees obscuring the full view, I could not successfully count my place. This was for the best. I counted 4 women before I made the turn, and 4 women in my view in front of me. I was at least in 9th 

Once we pop put of the circular driveway we hit mile 2. M2 - 6:49

I am grateful we have only 1 mile left.  I feel ready for that hill. I am moving well.  I am holding my pace. I am catching and passing the women I could see. We crest the hill and I can feel I have a kick waiting. I am trying to decide when to push. I see a woman ahead. If move now I have time to catch her.  I tell myself “You only saw 4 women the out and back before the turnaround and you passed all those you saw in front you at that turn…. so if you pass her maybe you can take 5th place… there is a chance” and I push.  If I had a chance for 5th I wanted it,

Just before the mile 3 mark, I open up my stride. I drive my arms. I drop my pace.  M3: 6:51 
Still holding on with another gear to tap into! 

And in that moment, when I was finally racing again, I forget all about my fear. I was finally free. Free of 2+ years of pain. Free of 2+ years of set backs.  I felt a live. I felt like myself again. 

Last .1 = 6:14 pace.


I was NOT 5th, but  it didn’t matter. Visualizing that I could have been inspired me to work hard to not let it slip away. I don’t think I would have kicked so hard at the end if I knew I was fighting to hold on to 12th. My placement doesn’t matter. What matters is I won my battle and I felt like a champion for just a few moments.   

Stats:
Time 21:12
Pace: 6:48
Place OA-Female - 12
Place AG -1 
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    Shannon McGinn, JD, MS, MA, EDS, NBC-HWC, ATR-BC, LPAT. 
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    Endurance. Functional Nutrition, Lifestyle, Health, and High-Level Wellness Coach. 

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